It has been the sort of week I need serious recovery from. I met my coach/therapist this week and he talked to me about the term “emotional labor” – describing it as basically having to act in a different way than the way that you feel. I work in a very privileged community and this week my energy has been split between people throwing incredible tantrums that they can’t get their way around what they believe their kids must have/do in a rich, private school and families crying over the phone that, while they are running away from war, their kids cannot come to our school. My attention was split between music, laughter and halfassery around me with my colleagues and the desperation, confusion and utter bewilderment of refugees flocking to Bucharest, most of them not knowing what the next minute holds. Emotional balance these days seems like another luxury – and I was not that emotionally balanced to start with.
I noticed that I get home in the afternoon and I continue my oscillation: I go from being inundated by gratitude at the peace, love and fun in my home to feeling guilty and privileged (and not in a good way) and like I have no right to enjoy what I have. I knew the latter was a dangerous path to go down on and so hearing THE Brene Brown experiencing the same made me feel les awkward and gave me a good next step.
I inhaled Brene’s talk with Karen Walrond on Accesing Joy and Finding Connection in the Midst of Struggle and am getting Karen’s book – The Lightmaker’s Manifesto – How To Work For Change Without Losing Your Joy. The one thing I took from this was that the secret to balance lies in the answer to this question: How can I be healthy, purposeful and connected today?
In the times that we live in and the times that promise to come, balance is a must. The world cannot be saved by people who are dead inside and it is joy keeps us alive.