I was born in a communist country and for the first 13 years of my life I was educated and raised to believe that the leader of the country was the father of our nation. The person whose reason to exist was to take care of us. And then I watched him being executed on Christmas Day on live TV. Communism was overthrown in Romania in 1989, and for the next three decades I became part of a country that endlessly fought and debated around which candidate was worthwhile voting for. And none measured up to anything that was said about the communist leader I knew when I was a child. Not that he did.
By virtue of learning English in school, British English, and attending a high school that was bilingual, the first monarchy I got to know anything about was the British monarchy. I remember as a child learning about all of the traditions, all of the traditional landmarks in London or otherwise, the symbols of the crown and the ravens and the Yeomans and and and. I was of course, impressed : to me a teenager or a young adult, born in a communist country, all of this pump and circumstance looked like a fairytale. And then, as I advanced in age, I got to understand more about the behind-the-scenes of the British crown, and realized that my feeling when reading about all of the rituals and traditions with somewhat justified: I had always felt rigidity and performing when it came to the British royal family.
On New Year’s eve, Queen Margrethe of Denmark abdicated, allowing therefore the ascension of her son, Prince Crown Frederick to the throne. Tomorrow, Denmark will be witnessing the Ascension of the Crown Prince to becoming King Frederick the 10th, in an event that happens here for the first time in over five decades. Over the past two weeks, I got to know the Queen of Denmark through the eyes and stories of her subjects.
I have been mesmerized to hear the stories my Danish colleagues shared. I could feel pride and love in their recounting the many years Queen Margrethe served the country. Last night, before she no longer sits on the throne of Denmark, the heart of Copenhagen came together to thank their Queen. People of all ages took part in a show that was entitled something along the lines of “the great thank you” and I only watched a small part of it on tv. I was moved to tears by the messages that poured in from regular people of all walks of life, young and old. And though I understood very little, love, pride and loyalty transcended the barrier of a language I don’t know, as everyone was telling their Queen how they love her and will miss her. It was heart warming to watch representatives of the armed forces, police, hospital staff and the fire brigades gathered together just to say something about what their Queen meant to them and to thank her for her service. Now, I am not naïve. I do work in marketing, and I know there was a lot of work behind all of those clips. And yet, having interacted with Danish people over the past two weeks about this made me a believer.
I know that what you put into relationships you receive. Watching Danes celebrate their Queen and shedding tears at her abdication while understanding why that is, has helped me understand the reign of Queen Margrethe without having been in this country for it. I can infer from reactions around me that she was a kind leader, that she cared, that she made people feel seen and known, that she took part and was not removed, looking down on people.
One of the shows I watched this winter was The Crown, back to the British monarchy. There is a bit where Queen Elizabeth II is supposed to have contemplated abdication. And Prince Charles (the movie Prince Charles) tells his mother to look towards the Nordic monarchies like the Danish one in order to learn to become more modern. Frustrated with entire idea of abdication, the queen replies: “well, that is a bicycle monarchy”. It was, of course, intended to be pejorative and to point out that no other monarchy has the tradition and weight of the British one and, at the time, I understood it to be insulting to the Danish monarchy. Living in Denmark today and biking to work, I understand that the metaphor was correct. Through the eyes of Queen Margrethe’s Danish subjects I understand her and her reign to have been a simple, noninvasive, hard work and staying in its lane kind of monarchy, just like biking in Copenhagen often is.
Your Majesty, Queen Margrethe, you will be missed and you are loved. Droning Margrethe, du vil blive savnet og du er elsket. ❤️
Photo credit – kongehuset.dk
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