Sometimes I write these posts to share ideas I would like others to ponder as well. Other times … things just come out of me. Like this morning. Apologies to my few but loyal readers. Sometimes it is easier to share here … than to actually find words that have to pass from my brain to my voice.
Why is it that, when at the crossroads of disappointing others or letting ourselves down, we choose the latter road so easily? When do we fall out of our own graces? What are the consequences?
You would think that realising all of this about myself means I am doing ok. The truth is, many times I feel stuck at 50% – you know, the length of the road you have already walked when you admit you have a problem. Addiction is a constant, lifelong struggle. And it takes real strength to be able to carry it on.
When I was told for the first time that this is a marathon and not a sprint, I was happy. I thought it meant this is an effort you can pace for yourself where you can grab water in the in-betweens, breathe, actually sometimes even enjoy the scenery or the run. The reality is … this is a marathon of sprints.
It has become quite a habit these days that many use the word love as many times as possible trying to forge connection to an audience, they family, their friends. So many times we are tricked into thinking that love is these grand gestures, spending lots of money for a gift, recognition on social media, for others to see and like or envy, compromising until resent sets in. Nothing can be further from the truth.
I started looking for a funny, short soap to pick me up in the evening. Didn’t work. I then tried new seasons of shows I used to love. Nope. Not that either. Tried new shows altogether. Useless.
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